“Congratulations, grad!”
“Ms. MBA, we’re so proud of you!”
“Class of 2011: We did it!”
In my typical pre-flight procrastination routine, I sat in front of my computer hypnotized by my Facebook newsfeed. My half packed suitcase lay open in the middle of the floor, begging me to finish and head out the door. Instead I stayed, entranced by my thoughts of what could have been.
I nearly skipped all the way from the 72nd Street stop to the front door of my new Upper West side abode. It had been three weeks since I signed the lease and I couldn’t wait to buy new furniture and get settled. I couldn’t get the key in fast enough, and with nervous anticipation, I flicked on the lights.
It wasn’t nearly as big as I remembered. The bold blue walls had been replaced with a fresh coat of drab white. Two oversized roaches scurried across the floor to a new hiding place. Out with the final remnants of furniture and its last inhabitant went the remaining breaths of life.
My heart sank. What had I gotten myself into? I sat in the middle of the floor and cried.
“Thank you for the offer of admissions, Linda, but I have decided not to matriculate at Columbia Business School.”
I couldn’t believe those words were coming out of my mouth. For the last two years this is what I had worked for. Even though I had already earned a master’s degree in engineering, I was sure a spot in a top business school was the answer to my problems, my savior from the stress, boredom and torture of work and general uncertainty in life. But after countless cross country trips, too many informational sessions to count, 8 applications, 7 interviews, 6 acceptances and one hefty tuition deposit, I threw it all away.
I had awoken early as usual, showered and ate a filling breakfast. All errands were done and my apartment was spotless. I threw some final items in and zipped up my bag. Passport? Check. Camera and charger? Double check. The essentials were accounted for and I was Tokyo bound.
No MBA appended to my name, but in the same time span it takes to earn one, I had snapped out of my funk and got back on track. I downsized my life and rented out my condo, moved myself cross country from Atlanta to Los Angeles and renewed my commitment to walking the earth, meeting new people and getting into adventures.
As I roam the streets of Shibuya, taking in the foreign sights and sounds, I’m reminded that I made the best decision for me and my life.
Cheers to the next adventure!
May 16, 2013 at 3:14 pm
Just love the way you write!
May 16, 2013 at 3:21 pm
Aww thanks Camilo!
I need to do more posts like this more often.
March 12, 2012 at 8:00 pm
Love the way you wrote this…..and it’s totally you.
March 17, 2012 at 4:05 pm
Thanks! It is me and I enjoyed writing it!
December 5, 2011 at 4:24 pm
Awww yes, a blog that speaks to my inner spirit! This is such a well written post. For a moment, I stepped outside my self and not only could I see you there.. I could see myself there because I experienced it in its totality this summer!
All I can say is go on with your bad self!
December 6, 2011 at 9:22 pm
Thanks girl! I appreciate it. I can only imagine the impact your summer in Colombia had on you. But you know what, anytime you want to make a change, you can!
December 3, 2011 at 10:01 pm
GREAT READ! Just read your post on the Tribes page and as fellow engineer who is now studying (or finishing) my MBA I was intrigued with hearing what you had to say. I am as big on Travel as I am on my Career and I wanted to commend you on doing what must people don’t, which is being honest with yourself. Some may call it quieting but I think that its harder to do what you ultimately want to do and love to do than what family or society decided you should. Trust me even though I have found a good middle ground by achieving my MBA abroad not too many people thought I was crazy when I decided to get my career as an engineer to study abroad during a rescission for my program. Just remember it takes GUTS to be GREAT! Keep pushing the bar of your imagination and best of luck. Keep in touch!
December 3, 2011 at 11:55 pm
Thanks Cha! Most of my engineering friends are going through the same thing right now as well. It is hard to stop listening to all of the other voices and do what that little voice inside tells you to do. Lord knows I doubted and questioned myself fifty-leven times before I made that decision, but I’m thankful I had the guts to follow through.
Thanks so much for the support and congrats on your upcoming graduation!
December 3, 2011 at 8:44 am
This is a FABULOUSLY written post. Sometimes I get all caught up in “what I could have been” had I opted to go to Law School and become “more” than “just” a high school teacher. But then I realize that I am so so happy to have taken the path that I did. I really hope we meet somewhere in the world some day!
December 3, 2011 at 11:25 am
Thank you Oneika! Our paths will definitely cross sooner than later!
Oh, and I feel you, but get out of here with than just a teacher nonsense, especially given you teach foreign language (and all teachers are important) and you doing what so many dream about, but will never do.
December 3, 2011 at 3:46 am
This is precisely why I come to your blog, April! You speak FLUENT Life Design, and I love peeking into your life by way of your posts.
I hear you! I opted out of law school after spending more than a year at a great law firm (as a file clerk), getting my paralegal certification, and spending countless hours studying for, taking, and re-taking the LSAT.
I don’t regret it for one moment, and I can only imagine how much less you’ll regret foregoing your MBA status when you visit your gazillionth new country, or get hired by OWN network as a travel writer! *figured I’d put that out into the universe while I’m here*
Safe travels, April!
December 3, 2011 at 5:37 am
Sometimes I feel like I’m still a big mess, but I enjoy those moments when I have those moments of clarity AND I’m able to share it with (and hopefully help) others.
So didn’t know about your law path, but I know you are 100% happy with your decision. I’m happier and happier everyday with the little tweaks I made to my journey to get me closer to my goals and dreams.
Putting a lot out in the universe lately and will gladly claim OWN as well!!
Thank you for that and all of the amazingness you bring!